I could really use some input on my revisions for project 2. I spoke with Amy after class on Saturday and she said that I would probably benefit from a fresh start, but I wanted to give it one more go with this layout before I scraped it. I think I addressed almost all of her concerns (i.e. the stopping of motion, the font issue, etc.), but would just like a little feedback from my fellow classmates. Any insight would be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance!
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I think this layout works really well. The car definitely feels more open. The only suggestion I have is to maybe change the color of your sidebar. That faded color next to the faded background of the city is a little too much fading. It makes it look kind of washed out. Maybe try to match the color of the "Roadster" headline.
ReplyDeleteI like what you did with the space on the side. The car still feels closed in to me though. I feel like it should be flipped the other way to move your eye, but I don't know if you can do that with the background and all. You could probably do away with the screen behind the sub head text, maybe but a slight stroke on the font in Illustrator to bump the white up a bit. I agree with Anthony, about the sidebar color. The color of the car and background are so vibrant, the sidebar color seems dull. Though you would need to choose a color that won't overshadow the vibrancy of the car. Hope this helps a little! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteI like this layout better. Definitely less restrictive. I would flip the car (if possible) just to guide the eye into the layout.
ReplyDeleteDid you ever think of taking out the transparency behind the texts all together and have your copy sit on just a white page and then change the color of the sidebar to a more vibrant color. It means you would have to crop the picture of the car so that it takes up only the left page and not both. It might help because with the way you have it right now in a real magazine the end of your car would rest in the gutter. I hope I made sense.
ReplyDeleteI agree with the sidebar suggestion. It definitely needs a brighter color. I also think Ashley is right about getting rid of the transparency and using a different color for the text background. One small suggestion for the writing: instead of "the landscape on which we drive" I would just say "driving landscape." I like the layout overall.
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